steve in hollywood

I’m a pretty nice guy; at least, I like to think so. (Just don’t ask those other people who were in that video contest we had here a few weeks back.) Regardless, I try not to do horrible things to people, and I try to be responsible and courteous. If I say I’m going to call someone, I call them, with a few exceptions of course, like if I end up in the hospital with broken fingers and can’t dial my cell phone. (If my nose was smaller I bet I could dial with it but it just mashes the buttons.)

In the course of my life, I run into people who are just inexplicably rude, unprofessional, or worse yet — pretend to my face that they like me. This brings me to my main point today. I have a list. This list is people who missed out on the coolness of being friends with me because they were one of these types of people. When I think of this list, here are some of the people who specifically come to mind:

• Girls who say they will call/email me and never, ever do

I tried to think of who else would be on this list but got stuck. Seriously, this is most of them. Tell me if this has happened to you:

You meet a pretty girl (or guy if you prefer), she shares common interests in you, she isn’t married, she doesn’t have the Hep, and she talks to you like she really likes you. She even gives you her phone number or email (or business card, as it happens here in L.A.) Then you call, and get voicemail — no call back. I’ve even had some girls on Myspace who read my messages to them but just don’t reply. They don’t even tell you why. Even if you ask, “Hey, so why did you friend me but don’t ever talk to me?” or “Why did you give me your card, anyway?” (Yes, I’ve asked.) Sure, they add you as one of their 34,962 friends, but answer your mail? What a chore.

A lot of these girls I just want to be friends with (who will believe that?) or keep them as business associates as an actress I can call for later projects. Regardless, I’ve been blown off by more women than I can possibly count. And they will be sorry, very sorry, when I have buckets of money to swim in and I’m on the cover of every major magazine in the news stand. I bet they will say, “Gee, maybe I could have given that Steve guy a chance?” So they will dig up my card out of their enormous pile, or they will actually search Myspace for me, and they will give me a call, or an email.

And then… I won’t answer.

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